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She had seemed excited, perhaps nervous throughout the meal, fidgeting with her wine glass, drinking more than she normally would. It was over desert that she finally broke the news to me, finally spilled her secret. Married!? I hadn't even known she was dating anyone! How could she be getting married? If she was married, had a husband, then... then she'd never be mine!! I fumed silently as I sat there across from her, politely nodding my head and mouthing empty words of congratulations to her. The rest of desert was a blur and I left her at the parking garage, my mind still racing with the news of her engagement, my thoughts whirling around inside my head as I walked back to campus.As I walked through the quiet college campus, I couldn't believe Melanie was getting married, that she'd never be mine... all those years of dreaming, of fantasizing, and now, now she'd met someone else. But... but maybe I have a chance, I thought to myself as I paused outside my dorm room. She's just. " Why not?" Because I don't think I can say it right. Working here has taught me a lot about the dangers of small mistakes and misunderstandings." I'll take the risk, Valerie." Oh, the hell with it. I'm about to be kicked out anyway. There's nothing more they can do to me. My JAG representative was certain of that. The army I liked a lot. The chance to serve my country while learning skills that would serve me in real life. Civilian life. Except that I never wanted to become a civilian again. I intended to be in the Army for life. The Army helped me out when I had no sure path in life. Back then I had a few skills and no clear idea what I wanted with my life. The Army gave me both. I love the Army." That's good to hear."I let a note of bitterness show in my voice. "At least I used to. Now, because of the clumsiness of others I'm going to be drummed out of the service. Because the mistake was made by higher ranked officers, I'm to be the scapegoat. How can I respect an organization.
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